February 15th

So the day after Valentine's is dangerous for a person with a sweet tooth like mine. All Valentine's candy is 75% off...I have to stay away from stores until it is all gone. No joke. Did y'all have a sweet day yesterday? Jeff and I made homemade Italian Wedding Soup (and of course the entire time we were making it, I kept making cracks about our Italian Wedding...turns out I wasn't that funny), goat cheese and pesto grilled cheese, and delicious chocolate cupcakes with red butter-cream frosting. YUM. Nothing beats cupcakes from scratch. And yeah, I love that my day had some romance (Jeff writes the sweetest cards) and cooking together is so fun....but the highlight of my day was the slue of ridiculous poems that Elizabeth and I were texting back and forth to one another.

These "poems" had me laughing so hard that Jeff questioned my sanity. They probably won't be as funny to you guys (because you probably aren't half as weird or gross as we are...) but I thought I'd share.  Even if you laugh a little bit, it is worth sharing for that very reason! However, I'm only sharing the pg ones*...


roses are red, violets are blue
this rhyme was written especially for you
you are a treat
your lips are sweet
I want to touch them
with the tips of my feet

roses are red, 
violets aren't brown
won't you join me
for a romp in Perv Town
- me

roses are red
curtains are lace
it's really hard to tell
your ass from your face

roses are red
violets are best
i can't tell your back
from the front of your chest

roses are dead
violets are too
welcome to hell, 
it's nice to meet you!

roses are red
violets are blue
if I were a lesbo
i'd want to f you


*all poems belong to me and Elizabeth. you know, don't try to sell these gems as your own. I know it is tempting...


Kiersten said...

Those poems definitely made me laugh!
And I'm glad you had a good Valentine's Day :) It sounds like a great night!
<3 Kiersten

Emily said...

These poems are awesome and you don't want to know how much candy I ate. Seriously, think about what you know is what I probably ate and then multiply it by seven. Or at least six. Going on a sugar reduction diet this week...