7.20.2011

Johnny freakin' jump up

One thing that Alivia told me about blogging that has kind of stuck was that I should not worry about embarrassing myself with whatever I chose to write about.  She said that her favorite blogs are the ones by those people that are honest and open- not those that seem to have a wonderful perfect life and never ever do anything wrong.

So, in the spirit of that advice, here goes...

My morning started off pretty standard and calm- stumbled downstairs around 5:30am, quickly ingested a cup of coffee and checked my email and went out to water my plants.  I snapped a few photos because the sun was just perfect that early in the morning:

basil slooowly coming back to life


viney green beans

from seed!

evidence of some evil creature's destruction

Going to get some plants for these guys


Anyway, all was great. I was calm and peaceful. Then I decided to go for my morning run. Now, my runs have been as of late, quite relaxing. Early in the morning it is super quiet and everything is still. I maybe see one or two people out biking or walking but the neighborhoods I run through are usually still sleeping. Since I have decided to run for relaxation instead of speed, I have noticed a lot more because I look around as I'm running. Yes, I trip. Yes I have almost run into garbage cans. For those of you who know the story of me getting hit by a bike while running, this will come as no surprise to you that I am NOT very graceful. I don't really watch where my feet are going. I pick them up and put them down. Simple. I am honestly surprised I haven't been seriously injured. I KNOW I should pay more attention but I'd rather just observe the scenery- notice people's pretty gardens, or the chalk art on driveways, the stretch of brown-eyed Susan's on Canco Road...all that stuff that I had been missing out on when I was trying to get a 5k in under 26 minutes.

So, like I said, this morning I was running along the quiet streets happily gazing around, quietly humming to the song on my ipod (thinking back, probably not so quietly) and soaking up the morning air.

Pause: I know I shouldn't run with my ipod in when I am alone early in the morning but I am slightly addicted to my nike+ and besides, I turn the volume down pretty low and possibly could hear someone coming to get me or something...

As I turned down one street that I've only run on a handful of times, I noticed this crazy out of control garden taking up someone's entire front lawn. It was beautiful and messy and chaos. Huge rose bushes, clumps of lilies, brown-eyed Susans, daisies, all wound around one another- and grass. Lots of tall thick grass- kind of looked like sea grass or dunegrass oddly enough. So, there I am, slowly approaching this garden, slowing down and getting pretty close because I want to get a better look, in the QUIET and ALONE hours of 6:30am, when out of no where and when I least expect it, a bare chested (hairy) man JUMPS UP out of the brush in the garden about 2 feet away from me on the sidewalk.

I screamed.

I wish I could say I just screamed sound or at the very least screamed something normal like "ohmygod" but no. The words that came out of my mouth, loudly, were "holy shitballs batman!" and tripped over my feet (didn't fall!).

I have not the slightest clue why. But seeings how when I broke eggs in the grocery store last week I said "oh...chicken" I'm not terribly surprised. The hairy man started laughing (yes he had pants on) and said, "sorry to scare ya sweethaaaaht i was just weedin' down heeeeahh! Gotcha good though didn't I?"

GOOD god. My face turned 3 shades of purple with embarrassment and I sputtered a no-worries-sorry-about-that and ran away. Fast.

I'm not sure what annoys me the most: the fact that I assume other people don't exist early in the mornings or that some old man gets his jollies from scaring innocent runners.  I don't know for sure, but I have a feeling he saw me coming and thought it would be funny.  I probably would have heard him rustling around had my ipod not been blaring Justin Bieber. It is safe to say at this point forward I may just run without the music....or maybe just skip that street.

2 comments:

Emily said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.


omg i love you.



but please tell you don't actually listen to justin bieber.

Alivia said...

ahahhahahahahahahhaahahahahahahahahhhahhhahahaha
*breath*
hahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahha